*TW: This blog contains content around suicide*
If one wants to have a conversation about suicide, or would like to post about suicide, whether on social media platforms or amongst a group of friends, there are certain things to consider. It’s important to make sure you are addressing this sensitive topic in a safe way; a way that can be helpful, not harmful.
It will always be a delicate subject to discuss; however, it is especially so in more conservative cultures and those with a strong religious presence that may stigmatize deaths caused by suicide, and people who struggle with suicidal thoughts, and consider it an act of weakness and even sinful.
It’s crucial to address suicide as a (mental) health concern, not a disgrace.
First things first, a trigger warning is essential. Mention in the beginning what topic you’re about to discuss, and that way people can decide if they want to continue reading or not.
It's a responsibility to be addressing such a topic online, and the least desired outcome would be to trigger people, or make them feel misunderstood or alienated.
Suicide prevention is challenging and can induce feelings of fear and discomfort. But it has the capacity to save lives, and break the stigma around asking for help, and it’s therefore crucial that the conversation takes place! So, if you’re going to talk about suicide online, do it mindfully with the purpose of prevention and raising awareness.
A helpful thing to address within this topic is the myths associated with suicide, and debunking them. One widespread myth is surrounding the idea that suicide is a sign of weakness and selfishness, or the idea that it is attention-seeking behaviour when an individual is being vocal with others about their thoughts, or through non-fatal suicidal attempts. Talking about why these beliefs aren’t accurate can help change the discourse surrounding suicide, as well as the stigma around people who struggle with suicidal ideation, survivors of suicide loss, or people who have experienced a non-fatal suicidal attempt.
Conversations about suicide need to be free of judgement. They are meant to increase the support and resources that those struggling can receive and the understanding of it as a disease, and a preventable one. That should be the sole purpose of addressing suicide. Be empathetic and kind, instead of rushing into judgments and jumping to conclusions. No two people are the same in terms of their struggles and the factors that may lead them to a decision to take their own life.
In your conversation, try to focus on the hope and the recovery, on the fact that suicidal ideation doesn’t have to be mean a death sentence, that it doesn’t always last forever. Focus on the treatment options, the healing process, the resources, the support... in a way that encourages seeking help, and not despair.
We need to be careful about the language that we use! Language is powerful, and can have an incredibly strong impact. Words have the capacity to scar. Words have the capacity to encourage. Here are a couple of common examples of how we can adjust our language to be more empathetic, kind, and safe when discussing suicide. It is important to avoid the commonly used word “to commit” suicide, as it is rooted in a history of suicide being considered unlawful, and associates suicide with a criminal offense. This is incredibly archaic and unethical to presume, and adds to the sinful and punishable perception of it. Instead, we can say that a person has “died by suicide” or “ended their life” or attempted to do so. It’s also very important to not use the terms “successful” or “unsuccessful” when referring to a non-fatal suicide or suicide attempt. Once again, it's a mental health issue, not a crime, and also not something we want to glorify in any way.
Additionally, when posting about suicide online, addressing suicide, or wanting to initiate a conversation around it, we must avoid violating a person’s privacy, whether it be the person who has passed, or their loved ones. Avoid speculating about their thoughts and feelings, and making assumptions about their experience, a most common example of this is contemplating the why a person chose to end their life. Describing the methods of suicide that are used or can be used is also not safe, as it can irresponsibility lead to triggering thoughts and visuals for people.
Finally, refrain from blame; blaming the choice itself, the family, the close friends. Suicide can be really difficult to grasp and understand, especially for those who have suddenly lost someone close to them. They might feel the need to point fingers towards someone or something to ease the pain or reach some peace. One might blame themselves; others might blame the person who passed away for making that choice. It is normal to feel anger, sadness, confusion, guilt, and many other difficult emotions. But if you are going to have a conversation out loud/online, ask yourself first, what do I want to reach? Is what I'm saying helpful, or harmful?
Suicide is caused by a number of factors, and each person may be struggling differently. If someone struggling notices that the common conversation surrounding suicide is filled with judgment and blame, this can prevent people who need help from seeking it, and can lead to far more harm.
Choose kindness whenever you can, as much as you can.
Learn more around how you can participate in safer conversations about suicide online, here.
